STYLE ME?: RUMER WILLIS

BRATZ ALERTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

God the cultural world has indeed come to a sticky and ridiculously pathetic end in Blighty. Would you pay to go see a bunch of untalented and pretentiously z-list celebs like Kelly Osbourne, Jodie Harsh and Sophie Ellis Bextor try and fucking act??!

BRATZ: Kelly Osbourne & Boyfriend @ Bungalow 8 (a night club) in LONDON (a city), on a WEEKDAY (a week-day..?).

Now, I’m no angel but that’s OKAY. I don’t LIE or pretend to be ONE. But why go out of your way to say you’re DONE with partying and then go PARTYING….on a WEEKDAY!!?? For NO reason other then, erm, to PARTY??!!

BRATZ: TYRONE ‘my dad’s a Rolling Stone’ WOODS.

Tyrone has been on my blip-ish. I mean Ronnie Woods an his missus have soo many kids, I stupidly assumed that they were still pre-teens! Silly me! We have a new-ish BRATZ on the scene! Meet Tyrone Woods part of international fraternity that is “arist-rockracy”! YO!

BRATZ: Introducing Miss Alice Dellal.

Oh you know all about the BRATZ by now. They are spoilt London rich kids who think they are entitled and too cool for school. They range from Kelly Osbourne to Jaime Winstone. They haven’t got a clue BUT they think they have! Usually riding off the coattails of a rich or famous parent.

BRATZ!!

Everyone, meet Alice ‘i’m a heiress of £800 million-Black Jack’s granddaughter girlfriend of pretty boy Casaraghi’ Dellal.

LOATHSOME EVENT OF THE CENTURY: THE GLAMOUR AWARDS

Sigh. What fucking loozers, huh? It’s so embarrassing when they pay b-list Hollywood stars to turn up and award them with a weird and random prize! Was Glamour always this bad, didn’t it used to okay in the 90’s? Was I imagining this?

God and for the really funny and CRAZY bit, check out the list of ‘winners’. Kate Moss won, wait for it best ‘Entrepreneur’?! Gulp. Do they even know what the meaning of the word is? Are you with me on this one? Should will blow up the Glamour building with all its stuff to smithereens? Yeah?! Yeah!!