BLIND ITEM MADNESS!! TED CASABLANCA STYLEEEeee

24 04 2008

Who D’is??

“Indeed, the Dangle dude’s been in trouble myriad times with too many drugs, too many women who were married to other men or by just being a plain ol’ mean, drunk bastard.”

“Dangling Wrangler’s at it again. You know Dangle-babe: He’s the base-boy the whole world seems to love no matter how many episodes he efs up, (via himself, the law or the ladies). Indeed, the Dangle dude’s been in trouble myriad times with too many drugs, too many women who were married to other men or by just being a plain ol’ mean, drunk bastard.

Therefore, the publicist’s quick fix was required (rehab and several staged photo shoots with Dangling looking brow-furrowed and fine with fans and such). Worked for a bit. But, then—as usually happens when one cleans up for a press release instead of for a personal mission—Dangling’s not only back to the booze and slut races, he’s hitting the hard drugs more than ever. Looks like crap, too. But the gals don’t seem to mind—they actually like screwing a famous guy who’s good (for about five minutes these days) with his huge, never-washed zucchini.

Alas, even the quickie quickies don’t do it for D.W. any more. Could that be why he’s getting so bored with dumpee broad after dumpee babe that he’s now secretly courting his latest unluckiest girlfriend’s (very underage) daughter?

Why the hell don’t people like this ever get caught? No, in Hollywood, they get Oscars, don’t they?”

I say:
He is publicly love BIG TIME.
Hardcore party ANIMAL.
He engages in the odd pub photo.
He must not be married-as he breaks up with girlfriends.
He’s won an oscar.
UPDATE: opps, he says ‘episodes’, so he’s obv a TV star

Colin Farrel? Who do you think?

UPDATE:
Charlie Sheen??? Kiefer Sutherland?

Via Eonline

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